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Winter Olympics fan says he’ll settle San Diego County lawsuit for “a beach house and a Bugatti.”

February 5, 2010 - 5:16 pm

Symbolic Motor Car Company sells these settlements.

Imperial Beach resident Bruce Calhoun, self-described “sole heir to the Calhoun fortune, Air Force veteran, Christian,” has filed a lawsuit against:

San Diego County, Greyhound, Wal-Mart, AMC 24, Hometown Buffet, Otay Mesa Condo Rentals, San Diego County Sheriff, Border Patrol, San Diego Coutny Parks & Recreation, the National Guard, the Border Patrol, FBI, CIA, Department of Defense, the Veterans Administration, Factory 2-U, Chase Bank, the Edward J Schwartz Federal Building, the San Diego Fire Department, the laundromat at “13th and Palm,” CVS and the Social Security Administration, some unnamed lifeguards….

Yes, that’s the Department of Defense and Hometown Buffet in one lawsuit. What’s the charge?

These above defendants attempted to murder me yesterday, February 3, 2010, Wednesday, the same day that I withdrew my $1,074.00 Social Security Check from Chase Bank in order that I can go to the Winter Olympics in Vancouver, Canada with the Olympians from the Chula Vista Olympic Training Center that you all rape, murder and steal from.

Oh, wow. That does suck. I wouldn’t want anyone to murder me on the way to the Winter Olympics, either. How much is Mr. Calhoun asking for in damages?

I will settle for a beach house and a Bugatti today!!!

He specifies the Bugatti should come from Symbolic Motor Car Company in La Jolla.

You can view the hand-written court filing here.  You can read CityBeat contributor Justin McLachlan’s story on “vexatious litigants” here.

7 Comments leave one →
  1. February 5, 2010 - 7:15 pm 7:15 pm

    Why is it these guys always know to check RICO box on the form?

  2. February 5, 2010 - 7:28 pm 7:28 pm

    I wish I could sue everyone that irritated me in a given day.

  3. PistolPete permalink
    February 6, 2010 - 1:15 am 1:15 am

    WOW! Just… O_o

    No wonder my lawsuit against Vectron-13 from the Planet Bologna is taking so long. 😀

  4. February 6, 2010 - 12:22 pm 12:22 pm

    Bruce Calhoun and Grace Sandoval = match made in heaven, natch.

  5. mr. mike permalink
    February 7, 2010 - 3:16 am 3:16 am

    He should be quietly ushered down to the PD station and given the choice of dropping this stupid suit or immediate deportation (with the loss of American citizenship) to Siberia, where he will become a citizen of the Russian Federation with a proviso that he never leaves Siberia. Want a Bugatti? Here, get this rusted-out Moskvitch 1500 for your troubles.

    • February 7, 2010 - 9:03 am 9:03 am

      I had no idea you felt so strongly about Hometown Buffet.

  6. mr. mike permalink
    February 8, 2010 - 12:02 pm 12:02 pm

    It’s all part of my “Send the Pissants to Siberia” Program, which is manly to deflect any outside chance China might walk away with that chunk of Eurasia when Putin/Medvedyev aren’t looking (crazier things have happened.)

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